Yes it is chinese new year... keke.. which means holiday.... yay... Let's see what I did for these few days... Actually come to think of it, I don't know should say done a lot or should say do very little... Why I say that, that's simple.. Cause I am like at home for most of the time for both eve and first day of CNY.

CNY eve.. Stayed at home until around 8pm then went out on the eve to river ang bao. haha... super crowded sia... and the best part, change place... was so shocked initially when we reached the old site and saw a pitch black, but nonetheless manage to find the new site after following the crowd. haha... 7 mins of fireworks viewed... very nice... although it is SOS (same old stuffs)

CNY day 1... hmm... again stayed at home all the way until 7pm then went for a movie with my brother and mum... Fearless... well, not a bad one considering i like triller... haha...

After these few days of staying at home... those when I on MC and including now these holidays... I am sort of beginning to enjoy staying at home le... athough bored at times but then maybe it feels more relax to be able to lax at home... think very soon I am going to change from a outbound to inbound person le. haha...




Just an email from my 'gay' pal from chicago. He sure has a good command of language. Felt so touched by his email and at the same time feel sorry for him now that he is all alone in chicago again. Can't imagine myself in his position if I am all alone overseas for my studies...

All those things that he wrote about how he enjoyed himself during his short stay in singapore during the dec vacation. It just seems so funny... Not everyone seems (this is from my point of view) to really care about whether he returns back to singapore or not... At least i cannot tell from their facial expression how much they miss him since he last left... but it sure seems that he missed us more then we do miss him..

So why do people only treasure things that only appear in tiny little bits that appears to be so precious whereas on the other hand they don't really bothers about it when it is in abundance... that's why i always say humans are stupid, they never treasure the things they all the while have.. they only think of them when they start to lose them... and even more surprisingly, some just carry on life as though nothing has happened.. yesh.. you may say that life goes on but then are you sure that it does not even impact your life at all during the stage when the thing is still in existence... Sometimes we are just too busy and forgot to take notice of people who have been really doing their best to do their part in your life, don't they deserved something better from you... Hmm... There is no way we can do so many things at one time and that is where choices come in... We are forced to make decision that we do not really want it that way... So in life, we got no choice ? I don't think so.. It will all depend on how you look at things and how you take things.. Be too careless or neglience is a sure way of getting into trouble..

Tomorrow is CNY eve and I am still planning what to do... Guess I shall sleep through the CNY. haha... thought of going in Malaysia to visit my Xiao Bu Dian but then it is being postponed so at the moment, I shall just stay at home and sleep. haha... Good way to rest.. One of my friend told me something which I find quite true about myself.. I never know when to stop, I always over-play, over-work and over-eat.. It is until my body cannot take it and I fall sick then I know when to stop and rest... Maybe that's my life... I cannot stop... There are still people who need my help, there are still work to be done... Yeah... (^_^) Gambade !!




Yay... at last back to my office le, not that i am really that happy to be back but then back means I have recovered from my fever although still having a bad headache now and then.

Well actually came in to write a short blog. I find that I trust people too easily or simple to say, just plain guilible or ignorant or just plain stupid.. Yesterday I was watching one show and I sort of believed what the person in the show was saying even until when the show already openly declared that the person is lying and I still did not detect it until the very ending part when it is just super obvious then I realised that the person is lying.. So am I easily being con or is it that I just don't mind being con.. I admit that I was really good at detecting people who are lying until now I am starting to have doubts... Maybe I just don't mind people telling me lies ba.. haha.. If someone was to tell a lie, it is obvious that he/she has something that he/she does not want to tell you about so why ponder on. Ultimately if he/she wants to tell you about it, he/she will tell you about it. That's all for now le. tata




For those who got contact most prob knows that I am very sick so what am I doing online now ? All thanks to the stupid colleage of mine... Afraid of getting scolding from the person so asked me to call the technicial to cancel the booking for this morning... Sucks right... Already email her to tell her that it is not feasible le loh... Very piss off by her... don't do her work, everything about the equipment also don't know now even this kind of simple email thingy also want me to do. Anyway I shall get back at her one day... haha... sounds so evil... but then i always also say say only.. in the end sure get too soft hearted and ended didn't do anything de.

Feel so warm to know that there are still people out there that cares for me... irregardless of whether it is just a sms or phone call or tag, it means a lot to me. Thanks ppl. I will stay cheerful de. (^_^)




Yeah, here I am updating my blog again. .keke.. but then this time different wo. This time is at home.. wahaha... but then not really something to cheers about too because I am down with fever again... yesh... again... haha... guess I have really tired out myself until a point where I don't have enough rest. Now this wednesday still got some stupid quiz which the lecturer says that he will set a paper to make sure we will complete it only 10 mins before the time is up.. sucks right... haha.. but then no choice.. guess today got to mug for the whole day le... don't like last min work.. keke..

Oh, yah, later at 130pm going for my car servicing... yesh... she is 5000km old le... haha... think i used her too much le.. must reduced on my activities and let her rest more... that's why this time I bought her the best engine oil I can find in the market... Cost me a whopping $103 !!!! hopefully that will make her healthy and live a long life.. keke...

Last sat was fun... went to one of the place i quite liked.. the settler's cafe to play board games... yah... some people may think what fun there is in playing board games but i can only tell you, until you try it yourself, don't make any comments... haha... It was tongli's birthday, hope he has enjoyed himself.. so sad that on that day , one of my friend was in a foul mood due to some stupid act from friends... well all I can say is forgive and forget and this world will be a better place to live in. keke... sometimes it is good to just act stupid and things really pass by fast... really fast... well, all these are just said only, not that she will read my blog. haha...

Well sunday was another gathering... really had a hard time yesterday... was not really feeling well le but then not so nice to just cancel the meetup cause one of my friend already pang sei them le... so I pull myself out of bed and joined them... had a nice chat with them and updates... too bad I got some hearing problem on that particular moment... guess it is due to the heaty effect of my body... cannot hear properly recently... haha... anyway that's all for now... tata.. (^_^)




I find that I like to think of a lot of stupid things... Very minor things to other people but to me means something... But anyway not important, not that I am in any position to expect any thing from people. I find myself very stupid... Always sms people and stupidly wait for sms replies from them which sometime never ever existed... So I must be very stupid... Emotionally stupid, too easily trusted people that I should not have placed trust so quickly... Disappointed and dejected is how I felt... Maybe I am just too emotional, sensitive or whatever... I don't really care now... Just too tired to think of anything... Everytime I get some hope for something but the next moment this hope just play me out and made me feel even more difficult... How I wish I can stop thinking.. how I wish I can do what friend did by making myself very tired everyday so that I can stop all thoughts and just go to sleep... I am really very tired... I shall no longer think about anything anymore... Disappointed with life... Disappointed with myself... I no longer has the ability to help others... now I am really lost and in need of help...

So humans are stupid... They always like to wait for things that will never exist... They always like to hope for things that will never happen... Are there really miracles in this world... I doubt so... I am too sagitarius like... I am too in need of care from friends... I find myself useless... Have been considering for some time if I should join the buddist society.. Heard that I can get all busy with and they have lots of things to make me occupied 24/7... Maybe that will solved all my problem... guess I have to depend on the very last thing that I never thought I will depend on.... God... please save me from my agony... I can't feel my heart anymore.. it is numb......

This will be my last emotional blog and I shall no longer talk about my feelings anymore...




Yeah... back from lesson le. ends very early today.

Just a thought. Do you like competition ? Well, some get thrilled when they win in a competition while some treat it as a test for their own self and a check line for their ability... As for me, I don't like competition... find that normally when faced with competition, I will just back off... Don't know why, but just don't have the fighting spirit...

Another thought, will be love someone if you know that by loving that someone, you will cause some other people to be hurted ? Well, my friend used to tell me that there is nothing that you can do about it, but wouldn't it be sad for the party who is being hurted... I know exactly how it is like to be hurted... So I have not changed even after sooooo many years... I am still the stubborn person who will just easily give up to make others happy... stupid, isn't it?....




So it is not as easy as I thought to keep a promise.. It is so difficult.. But then as what my friend told me, just shun qi zi ran... Everything will be fine de. keke.. Cheers. Rushing out for movie le... wahaha... so later then blog somemore.




Extracted somewhere, find it rather sweet and of course self deceiving or self motivation whichever you want to think of it. haha..

15 Things You Probably
Never Knew or Thought About

1. At least 5 people in this world love you so much they would die for you.
2. At least 15 people in this world love you in some way.
3. The only reason anyone would ever hate you is because they want to be just like you.
4. A smile from you can bring happiness to anyone, even if they don't like you.
5. Every night, SOMEONE thinks about you before they go to sleep.
6. You mean the world to someone.
7. If not for you, someone may not be living.
8. You are special and unique.
9. Someone that you don't even know exists loves you.
10. When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good comes from it.
11. When you think the world has turned its back on you, take a look: you most likely turned your back on the world.
12. When you think you have no chance of getting what you want, you probably won't get it, but if you believe in yourself, probably, sooner or later, you will get it.
13. Always remember the compliments you received. Forget about the rude remarks.
14. Always tell someone how you feel about them; you will feel much better when they know.
15. If you have a great friend, take the time to let them know that they are great.
A Minute

They say it takes a minute to find a special person, an hour to appreciate them, a day to love them, but then an entire life to forget them.
Send this phrase to the people you'll never forget and remember to send it also to the person that sent it to you. It's a short message to let them know that you'll never forget them. If you don't send it to anyone, it means you're in a hurry and that you've forgot your friends.
Take the time... to live and love.




Hmm.. Just somehow came to this conclusion. I am useless.. Can't seems to get anythinh right.. Can't solved my own problem, can't solved my friend's problem because her problem is the same as mine and I can understand how difficult it is to solved. So maybe it is good to remain single and be cold-hearted afterall..

I dislike things that mess up my life but there are some things you are willing to let them mess up your life. Irony and complicated thoughts of humans...

Can't believed that I updated this entry three times le, just want to write down something that come across my mind before I forget. I used to scold one of my friend why is it that he treat his gf this way and he told me, reluctant to commit again is because he is afraid of being hurted again. I was lost for words for this applies to me too, in the way, I always find myself hurt very badly everytime I thought I can trust and commit myself into. First you change to be more wary of your surroundings and until a point of time you got so sick and tired of everything and just decide to shunt yourself from everything and just start to be complacent and ignore everythings and person that comes your way. So I am dead, tears no longer flow to cure my heart that has ached for so long. Nothing seems to go the way I expect, gas pipe leaks, equipment failure. Is it just me who are starting to get complacent or is it..... whatever... Guess my life shall carry on this way until someday someone come and save me out of this mess I am in.

How does it feels like to all of sudden no longer be with someone who is very close to you, a pillar whom you can always depend on... This is something I realised.. I cannot always find back the pillar to lean on everytime I met with problem, I have to learn to be more independent. Everytime I thought I am immune to things I thought I will be dead to but then again I find that these things are still in my heart waiting to be triggered.. Visible scars on skins can be removed easily by laser, how I wish I could remove my emotional scars that lies deep inside my heart as easily as that...

Just want to be cold hearted for the time being because I do not wish to be hurt anymore.. I am just a typical Sagittarius that long for someone to care for but I shall remain heart dead for the time being. Too disappointed with the words like, love and hate...




Now waiting for my 6.45pm lesson and yesh of course I at last succesfully done up my computer such that I can come online le.

While waiting for time to past... Some thoughts run over my mind while reading some blogs..

Read from one, friendship are the soil for the growing of love seeds.. The longer the friendship, the stronger will the love trees grow.. True or not ?

Been thinking for some time before I can type out something here... So everyone's thoughts and thinking and expectation changes over time.. Another random thought, I have seen how easy it is for others to reject people who like or love them but why is it do difficult for me to do the same too ? I think too much or simply because I know how it feels like to be rejected... True to be told, you can't accept someone whom you do not have any feelings for or never thought of it before.. No wonder my friends always mention something about, "well he ah... i can only say that he can only be a good friend but he certainty does not meet the requirement of being a boyfriend" Just curious how did they come to this conclusion ? Well the matter of fact because I find that I can treat a friend very well, but then it is never close to how I treat my girlfriend.. Experience from the past.. keke.. So much uncertainty and because of that I think that is why people nowadays prefer something fresh and new.

Read from a book yesterday which is very funny and interesting.. Gals like guys who are bad.. haha... It goes something like this, gal like guys who treat them badly because they get thrillled in this way possibly due to come childhood memories that they will want so much to rememeber back... Sounds logical but at the same time may just mean crap. haha.. Why I say that is because I read from another place which I find it more meaningful and of course more logical.. haha.. it goes like, "You do not need to try to understand a gal too much, just shower them with lots of care and concern, towards a guy, you really have to try to understand him to win his heart" Sounds really difficult huh.. haha.. I have friends who are still trying to understand their boyfriend even after many years of being close friends with them before deciding to choose them. Well another is more of a joke... "Man wished so much that after marriage their woman will not change whereas woman wished so much that man will changed after marriage. " haha..

Hmm... 6.20pm... still got time to crap somemore things in here... okay, you are right, I am bored in the office now.. haha.. Maybe should try one of my friend's friend blog where he zhi dao zhi yan.. haha...

... ... ... ... ...
Okay, too difficult for me... give up... haha..

Okay, let me tell you a story of my friend on how he found the one he love and being together with her in the end. There was this friend whom I knew in ntu. He sort of like one of the gal in the same class as us, so he tried all means and ways to woo her... Homemade chocolates to cook food for her to whatever things u can ever think of to make a gal happy, I am really impressed with him, but what he lack of course is a mouth that talk sweetly. So surprisingly, he could not manage to woo her.. Being a close friend of hers, I asked her, why didn't you accept him.. He is showering you with lots of care and concern that a guy.. okay a guy like him can possibly give.. But all she said was, he is a bit of the irritating, no feeling for him, threaten my friends unneccessarily... all those stuffs... hmm... okay... so this went on for a long long time... okay.. not very long also.. just a few months.. I have seen years one.. Until after some time being with him, I realised that he calls one gal very often to ask her what she should do in order to woo her and also confine into her whenever he is feeling dejected.. slowly slowly, I realised that the gal that he actually should be with is the gal that who has always been there for him.. (Storyline sounds like Jang Na Ra but then of course this is a real life one. haha) so one day I just prompt him about the gal who has always been by his side... So in the end, he saw a light in his life and both of them are together.. Long story with just a very short conclusion. I find that this happens to everyone including me, we never seems to look around us for those people who have always been there for us secretly and we sort of took them for granted but I must also admit that I do really respect those who have the perseverance to carry on despite being disappointed time and again.. Well, a very long winded story.. Can get tired just by typing it.. haha..

And lastly as promised, my aim for this new year.. Look ahead and move on, leave the past to be memories that always remain sweet in your heart, be persistent and you may lose every good memories that you have. They are still people who need help out there, revert back to my old self and carry on helping people. Seeing happiness in other people is equal to my own happiness. From Dharma teachings, the most important things in this world is not something that can be bought or taken..

That all for now and guess what... arghh.... going to be late for my lecture le... tata...




Few things i realised these few days.... that happened rite before my eyes... didn't know why i didn't stopped it but then.... i also don't know...

I realised that I cannot stop.... I cannot break down... There are so much people out there that still requires help... Not everyone have someone to be by their side when they need someone... But there are also some people who thought no body cares but then in actual fact many people cares for them... But nonetheless.. we should help them all whenever there are in trouble... that's what friends are for..

Some thoughts... So it is very easy to hurt someone but it is diffcult to save the situation... many people hurt one another unknowingly... and the results are very severe... Felt pain in him but I cannot help him.. Though I don't really like him but then I find him pitiful... What should I do... Should I join in to show concern about him... will he appreciate it ? I don't know... I just need to think a bit longer before acting this time... I don't want to do things in a moment of folly again...




Hmm... so I am now in the subject registration also le. haha... Need to take 3 modules... yah.. most would think so what.. haha.. but then hor, each of my MEng modules will be equivalent to something like 3 undergrads mods ? I don't know, will let you ppl know when i completed them. haha..

One modules I die die have to take is of course my supervisor's module. haha. Micro Electro Mechanical Systems, in short, MEMS. Friday night 6.45pm to 9.45pm.

Got another module I attended which I found very interesting but then the class is full so I wrote an email to the prof hoping he will accept me. keke.. The mod is call Advanced Metrology & Sensing Systems. Thur 6.45pm to 9.45pm.

The rest of the mods I may be taking is Quality Engineering, Tue 6.45pm - 9.45pm.. okay.. the timing are all the same.. so is only the days change. Probability & Random Processes Wed, Nanoelectronics Mon, and lastly Research, Critical Thinking & Writing Skills Wed 9.30am to 1230pm.

Okay, not that I reallly have a choice to make cuz ultimately have to depend on my supervisor who would approve or not the mods I have chosen, anyway that's all for now for the mods stuffs.

So words of life in here now:

Think before you act when working to prevent accidents and undue alarm to other staffs..

Never think too much in term of relationship stuffs cuz nothing logical will ever come out of it, in the end you will only find yourself making mistakes again and again. So everyone is the same, it is hard to forget.. You thought you have forgotten about it, but then it is actually still there. So what to do.... hmm.. I am also interested to find out the answer. keke.. (^_^) tata




Wow... new lessons started le... Got a real real bad shock when I attended the wafer processing lecture.. Basically, it is nightmare but then I have decided not to take the module le so no problem at all.. lucky I still have a choice in that.. haha..

Well, last night was a fun night. Went to the settlers cafe to play board games, played a few games, some very fun and some very exhaustive all thanks to my luck... wahaha... br right ? haha... Surprising I have been winning for the first few games... haha... really very surprised.. haha.. but really looking forward to the next board game session, want to bring my two bao bei to go also. keke.. After the board game thingy went out with one of my new found friend, seems to me that my friend is having some problems simliar to my bao bei's problem so I tried to help my friend to overcome it. It is just so nice to have someone to be by your side when you are in times of needing it. Anyway hope my friend who never reads my blog to be happy by now. keke... (^_^)




Oh well... a new entry for the new year.. Something which I must started out with my aim for 2006 ? haha... think too siong for me... i shall put up my aim list one of these days.. anyway my purpose for writing today is that i found something very perculiar... haha.. i just realised that i have like stopped knowing new friends for a very very long time le... when i say know new friends in the sense of not just knowing their name and a free chit chats... Recently just know one friend from one of my khakis.. Then because that friend is also in ntu, so sometimes we chat.. then I realised how much I know about my close friends.. haha.. a lot of things which I know about them and I have take it for granted... haha.. because i find that i know nothing about this new friend... haha.. so i find that it seems quite tough... haha... time to put my rusty skill back to good use again.. but then hor... there is even more interesting things... haha.. this new friend of mine actually can knock out two of my friends... haha... just imagine... ask me out can mention my friend's name first before me... haha.. so nice of him huh... haha... anyway that's all for now.. the next entry hopefully will be my aim list le... haha.. tata (^_^)